Here in Bauchi as a corp member, I’m what some people would extravagantly call a recluse. In real life, I’m what you would call an introvert extrovert. You know, those crazy people that look so reserved until you get to know them and then they are just all over the place and won’t stop talking. Yea, I’m kinda like that. In fact, my extrovert side is still a bit introvert.
Only twice in my life have I tried or made an effort to make friends and not just keep to myself. The first place was Law School but that was easy. I had lovely people all around me. I still never went as far as regularly visiting anybody but I told people that they could always stop by my room. I went out and I mixed. I tried sha. Some people still said I was too reserved. They don’t even know how much of an effort I was putting in. Anyway.
The second place was NYSC camp. I had ulterior motives though but in camp, I was everywhere. I made an effort to ensure that everybody knew me. If not everybody, at least majority. I wanted something and popularity was the only way to get it. It paid off in the long run but came with its disadvantages. I would cringe inwardly each time someone called my name. I felt like I had to suffer through all the greet-greet I had to do. But it paid off. I made some friends and I had fun.
Someone just told me that by keeping to myself so much, I tend to have a myopic view of life. Really? Is that true? Even with all the books I devour, is that even possible?
I once wrote about being purposely anti social (you can read about it here) and this was in Law School where I was making an effort to be a people person. I’ve seen very reserved people whose minds will blow you away because when they lock themselves away from people, they commune with books. They commune with angels. They commune with God.
So if you want to be all out there, that’s fine but don’t you think you should be a recluse or act like one sometimes? That’s what we call retreat these days. I don’t do retreats per se because already, I’m locked in my room half of the time. I’ve lived at this place in Bauchi for a few months and I’m generally known as The Girl who doesn’t leave her room. I’m very fine with that reputation.
As long as it’s not going against yourself, feel free to be locked away. Or not. The most important thing is to do you. I find this difficult to understand but the truth is that there are people who draw strength from human interactions. I’m the exact opposite. I find it draining.
And when you find someone who really wants to be left alone, leave the person alone. Forcing that person to go out would only cause more trouble for you because that person would be like a wet blanket on all your fun.
Thank you for reading my Ted Talk😂😂😂